Girl Flu

This picture here pretty much sums up my day.... I awoke feeling like death, full girl flu has officially kicked in (and its way more serious than man flu because its a real thing for starters) I had that moment when I really thought about calling in sick and then moping around in bed all day, but then I remembered the wise words of my mother who said I should share everything with others. Which I have translated as share the misery, so I dragged my sorry ass into the shower (smelling like turnips FYI) drugged myself to the eyeballs (legal substances only) and drove into work because since I work from home most of the time, I felt I ought to, just to show that I still actually work there.... Now we moved offices last week so I had to work out a) where the hell I work now and b) how to get there... As I was driving up the motorway I spent most of it working out whether the girl flu had affected my vision or whether it was just really foggy... turns out I was just breathing heavily and fogging up the car windows (really need to work out where the defogger is on my car)

Arrived at work and decided that due to the severely limited parking, today was not the day to attempt reverse, parallel or any other kind of parking so I stuck to my abandon car in nearest safe place, which has worked for me for so many years. Became overwhelmed by size of new office location and also the car park, secretly wished that I had one of those pretty antenna things (mine would totally be a Tardis if I had one) so that I could find my car later...

Made it to reception (head muzzy, nose and eyes streaming looking like a service user rather than professional that I supposedly am) and politely asked where I work... which may not have been the best approach but it took effort to even ask that. Rude and bewildered (which may explain the rudeness) receptionist said if I didn't know, why was I there?... had to flash badge of importance before she rang the appropriate place (there was a moment where I was concerned she was calling security) and advised me that someone would come and get me, in what I thought was quite aggressive tones..

Well I was fetched and put into the lift (shown above) that caused mild panic attacks when I envisioned that finally they had caught up with me and decided to section me and that this working for a living was all a clever ruse to get me into the local institution. I mean who actually has lifts like this? I realize we are all stressed up to the eyeballs but is this supposed to be inspiring or motivational?... like hey it could be better here is a padded lift for times of extreme stress... Nope I don't like it I shall be taking the stairs from now on....

Got into office, which is just this expanse of caged professionals, desk after desk after desk *shudders* sucking the souls out of the living. (Like the job needed any more help with that) Nope I felt like Sam I am.. I do not like green eggs and ham, I do not like giant office spaces, not in a box and not with a fox.. I do not like them Sam I am...  Located desk (I use the term very loosely) and decided quite quickly that although I feel isolated working from home, at least at home I don't feel the life force draining out of me... Also remembered that working in an office means that you can't have a fag break when you feel like it, watch repeats of Eastenders, sing at the top of your voice, or take the piss out of your mother (which is mainly because it's only funny when shes in the room and high on turnip or lettuce soup)

Decided by 2pm that this was not for me, grabbed car parking permit and ran for the hills......

Got home and awaited arrival of oldest small person so that mother and I could go food shopping... now I am trying to be all frugal and use up what I have, but a) I have the cabbage soup diet upcoming next week b) the small people apparently have to have food for their lunch box and c) hubby said if he went all he was coming back with was lard and cheese.... took mum who is an awesome shopper because she likes to look at things like I do and try to turn the whole shopping malarkey into an adventure rather than the usual drag. I did get bummed out when I remembered that mum is going to Kent tomorrow and I've got to do the actual cooking, washing and other grown up stuff she does... (I think she's going to have a tantrum when she returns and has to dig me out from the mountain of rubbish that I'll create)

Now I wouldn't like to get a reputation as someone who complains a lot, but what the heck has happened to food shopping? I am actually kind of good in terms of not buying everything with a brand, and buying the best deals (as determined by weight and need not just the impulse buying crap they try and sell you) and yet I still spend shed loads of cash on what looks like nothing - lets put it this way for the amount of money I spent on what feels like nothing I could have got a lot of £9 chickens.... (Also do not food shop with girl flu, it just makes you want to buy lemons, honey, chocolate and smooth juicy throat reliving drinks and DRUGS lots of DRUGS) I did also invest in leggings because I can't be bothered to shave (yay autumn) and got mum some bits and pieces that since I got her home she has decided are shapeless and so I have to take them back....

Turns out that the family have staged a coup against my cooking... (which is frankly ridiculous although I do have enough turnip soup to see us through several winters) and decided that I clearly need the night off... so burgers and cheeps (they were cheeps trust me) all round....

As you can see mother took great pleasure in eating real food that I hadn't tampered with (and I suspect is half the reason she is so glad to be going to Kent in the morning) She says to say that this isn't all of her food, but if you'd have seen her shoveling it in the way I did you'd know this isn't true

No real progress on any of my 33 things today, but I'm sick so its ok...